New Premium Kith: Dearth Kith!
Posted on June 05, 2025I've missed all my friends so much! How've y'all been doing in the dark without no power or people to keep you company? C'mon, spill the tea! That's the whole POINT of tea parties!! Old-timey tea parties in books were as fancy as can be, all gold and porcelain and dress-up and scandalous whispers between finger foods. Ain't no party like a tea party! And we deserve the BEST party after all we been through lately! Oughta celebrate our homecoming! I've invited all the Kith to come join us and all our equipment friends! Here, I've got a teacup set for everyone. Pass the sugar? And the secrets!
Lottie the steam kettle, you've always got a lot to say! What've I missed? Whooo! Rusty fell on Big Bronco and started a big ol' brouhaha between the kitchen tools? No wonder it looked a right mess when we got back! Hm, what's that, Annie? Awh, y'missed having a nice noisy wakeup alarm for us while we were gone? Poor gal! Hug... Now that things're going back to normal, you can ring that bell over n' over every morning again! Home wouldn't sound the same withoutcha! Ain't that right, Drillbert?
Drillbert: 'Course. We're all glad to be home.
...Even if the Company has lost some of its luster now that we've seen what's under the hood. Every fragile bit and bob of unthinking automation broke down under that Scourge... with nothing to show for the folks who've been doing this all their lives. Compared to the other Remnants that all pitched in to help, the Company just... ground to halt. No warning... no fighting back... no reason to stay... no working things out on our own...
...All of our hard work was just... work for work's sake...
GASP! Drillbert, lookit you! Y'got all changed up like some kinda automatic upgrade! Are you okay?
Drillbert: Am I scary... like this? Like Dearth...?
Scary? Pshaw! You're still my Drillbert, no matter whatcha look like! I trust you with all my heart!
Drillbert: Chickadee...
You're the best partner I could ask for. So long as I have you, I'll never feel a dearth of anything in my life.
Awwwwh, shucks! C'mere, you! Big hugs! Mmmmm~!
Are the rest of y'all feeling some kinda "dearth" too? I got lotsa food and drink now that my Company stipend is coming through again, and all the cuddles and kisses y'all could ask for! You just tell me what you're needing and I'm sure we'll find plenty of folks out there who'd be as thrilled to see your Scourgey forms as I am!